It cannot be overstated how ridiculous a movie Winterbeast is. Shot over a period of years, you get to watch film stock, hairstyles, locations, and possibly characters change without warning. There’s a missing person in an unidentified wilderness/state park tourist area. The park rangers go looking on the mountain and find a totem pole with skeletons hanging from it, that no one seems to know about. The lead park ranger is not from the area, or maybe he is, we’re told both. His partner is a pervert who wears sunglasses day and night. There’s a lady park ranger, and a lady who runs the gift shop, and a guy who knows some stuff about local legends. Every time the gift shop lady, the legend guy, and the head park ranger sit to talk, there is a bottle of milk on the table.

Oh, and there are stop motion demons killing everyone: Bigfoot, Groot, a giant chicken, a zombie, a giant lizard, and finally, the titular Winterbeast emerges like a chestbursting xenomorph alien from an unidentified character no one even mentions. Someone finds the body of the lady park ranger inside a hotel, but we don’t see who it is, and it’s never mentioned.

Oh, and I forgot to mention the best part: the owner of the hotel, which is called the Wild Goose Lodges because the entire movie is a wild goose chase for the plot, is a flamboyant crazy person who lipsynchs and wears a mask while surrounded by skeletons, and eventually his head catches on fire due to demons. After which the park ranger and the local legends guy just return to work and never mention it again. Oh man, and there is a three shot that looks like a Kraftwerk album cover, and some of the victims of the demons turn claymation when they are attacked. I am so excited about this movie I have told you everything I could think of, but you just need to go watch it. It’s all on YouTube, and it will fly by in a haze of awesome animation and an incomprehensible story, and you need to see it NOW. I can’t decide what I like best about this movie, so you tell me!